Midnight wanderings

I am in a season of something challenging. I won’t bore you with the details today as this post is about God in the midnight wanderings. Romans 8:38  says “Nothing shall separate us from the presence, the love of GOD” Death can’t, neither angels or demons, neither the present or the future, nor any powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all of creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus”

I took a shower at 2am, hot and thankful with the blessing of that comfort. I prayed for those less fortunate than I am, those who are in the deepest places of need and I felt renewed with purpose. I asked God to join me in my irregular symptoms, I asked him to comfort all who are in pain.

My mind wanted to go somewhere else, it wanted to be wild and frightened and angry. It wanted to be selfish and small. I just went beneath the symptoms and I felt his touch. I turned the mind to his mind “We have the mind of Christ” and I prayed to think his thoughts. When the mind went back into the groove of anything else I breathed in his peace and I exhaled the anxious thoughts. I listened to a mediation tape and I drifted.

It is now almost the new day and I am waiting for his strength to “mount up with wings like eagles to run and not grow weary to walk and not grow faint” My day does not depend on me, but on Gods mercy Romans 9:16 “It does not therefore, depend on man’s desire or effort but on God’s mercy.”

My life can certainly be challenging. I have been in the midst of waiting for a movement from God for a very long time in regards to my health. Truth is many saints died never seeing the promise. BUT GOD. It’s all on him really. Whether I live to be 100 or I die tomorrow he is GOD and I am not. I ask for this day to be okay with all of that. The fact that I have been able to do this for so long is his mercy. Nothing separates me from God…not even all the seemingly unanswered prayers.woman-2877322_1920

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